Flash Fiction: June 17, 2016

Peter Steen, winner of the Versilimitude Award for his work as author of the Ohana books, went into his meeting full of adrenaline and ready to ensorcell the producer.

He plunged right into his pitch. “I have an idea for an allegorical plot involving a villain who inserts a microchip into citizens to cause bigotry. And it would be serendipitous to have a redneck as the benevolent character.”

Peter realized the despicable producer was more focused on his quesadilla and jumbo shimp, clearly jaded by his previous meetings.

“This is scrumptious,” was the producer’s only reply before he shoved a nacho in his face and let out a fart.

Peter had indulged in a little too much moonshine, and instantly lost all humility, wanting to put the producer in the hospital.

“Yeah, I thought we could have Carol Brady turn into Spiderman, and when she’s not using a rocketship to roto rooter the bad guys she could jazzercise, sing karaoke, and commit stricide, murdering icicles all over the place.

“Astounding,” The producer nodded.

“Really?” Peter continued with his purposeful flim-flam, lugubrious. “Well I thought it might be useful to have her love and attraction to a Snoopy tabernacle as the Macguffin of the film.”

And with that Peter signed his first movie deal.

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